China DOS Union

1、A man saw an advertisement: No surgery, no hospitalization, make your genitals easily bigger and thicker! He was overjoyed and immediately remitted the money. After a few days, he received a parcel and eagerly opened it! It turned out to be a magnifying glass! 　　
　　
2、The priest asked a couple: If the end of the world will come in five minutes, what do you want to do? The husband replied enthusiastically: Want to have sex. The wife gave him a white look and said quietly: Then what to do with the remaining four minutes?　
　　 　
3、Two dung beetles were discussing the welfare lottery. A said: If I win the grand prize, I will buy all the toilets within a radius of 50 miles, and eat to my heart's content every day! B said: You are too vulgar! If I win the grand prize, I will hire a living person and eat fresh every day!　　
　　
4、On the morning of the wedding night, the groom woke up and found the bride in tears. He was surprised and asked: Darling, why are you crying? The bride cried: How will the days be in the future? Your thing has shrunk to an unrecognizable appearance after using it all night! What to do in the future!　
　　
5、An old man took a bus to Gaochao Village on business. On the way, he asked the female attendant: Has Gaochao arrived? The female attendant: Not yet. After a while, he asked again: Has Gaochao arrived? The attendant said: Old pervert, why are you in a hurry? I will shout when Gaochao arrives!　
　　
6、The wife came home at dawn after playing mahjong. In order not to wake up her husband, she first took off her clothes in the living room and then entered the bedroom. She happened to meet her husband waking up, and he was furious when he saw it: It's too much! You actually lost everything?　
　　 　　
7、A lady ordered a stir-fried whip flower when eating. When picking up the dish, it accidentally fell between her legs. The lady was shocked: This thing is really powerful! After cooking and chopping, it still knows the way!　
　　
8、A young man saw that the neckline of a beautiful woman on the bus was very low, and the spring was exposed. He teased: It's really a place where peach blossoms are in full bloom. After hearing this, the beauty lifted her skirt and said: There is also the place where you were born and raised!
　　
9、A man and a woman were having sex. The woman suddenly jumped out of bed, ran into the kitchen, grabbed a handful of rice from the rice tank, came back and sprinkled it on the man's body, and said angrily: Stop making a fool of yourself here, go back and feed the little chicken big first!　　

10、A country woman reported a case and said: It's embarrassing! I was raped last night. The police asked her what the man looked like? Well, I didn't see it clearly, but it must be a novice, because he couldn't find the place for a long time, and finally I helped him get in.
　　
11、The fox fell in love with the rabbit and invited it to drink beer. The rabbit got drunk, and the fox took the opportunity to rape it. A few days later, the fox called the rabbit to drink again. The rabbit said: "Hey! I won't go! I won't go! My butt hurts after drinking beer"　
　　
12、A girl returned home at midnight and was attacked by seven thugs. When in danger, an old woman stood up to save the girl and was gang-raped herself. When interviewed by the radio, the old woman said: Actually, I didn't think anything at that time, I just thought this good thing couldn't all be cheap for that little slut!　
　　
13. A country woman went to the city for the first time and wanted to go to the toilet. After a long time, she didn't meet one. She had no choice but to ask the police for help: Comrade, there is a public toilet in front. May I ask where the women's toilet is?

14, The young man stroked his girlfriend's thigh in a miniskirt: Darling, I love you! The girlfriend was so fascinated by the caress: Higher, higher! The young man raised his voice: Darling, I love you!

15、The warden asked the prisoner, and the prisoner said: Bed front bright moonlight, no money is anxious, look up at the bank, look down into the cell. The warden: Born for decades, no money in the pocket, robbed a small bank, been in prison for several years.

16、A child found a female corpse by the river and then called the police and said: A woman by the river was beaten to death, there are two big bags on the chest, a knife was cut between the legs and a lot of blood came out, it is estimated that the death time is too long, and hair has started to grow at the cut place!


Don't reply if you don't plan to, don't laugh!

I saw a strange phenomenon, that is, some people who read my post did the following things soon after:
1、Successfully fell in love;
2、Negotiated a business;
3、Got promoted and became rich;
4、Felt comfortable;
5、Harmonious family;
6、Good health;
7、All the best.
These people are the brothers and sisters who first like and then read, and read and then like.
Chairman Mao taught us: "Must like a good post when you see it!"
Chairman Mao's words are very reasonable.
Is it so difficult to reply?

There are some to watch! Support the landlord!!!

Come back. Seeing that the LZ has said so... How can I not come back!

Start playing with tongue: See your tongue level
1. Newcomer: Chemical fertilizer will volatilize
2. Slightly famous: Black chemical fertilizer turns gray, gray chemical fertilizer turns black
3. Famous in one area: Black chemical fertilizer turns gray and will volatilize; Gray chemical fertilizer volatilizes and will turn black
4. Famous worldwide: Black chemical fertilizer volatilizes and turns gray and will make flowers fly; Gray chemical fertilizer volatilizes and turns black and will make flowers fly
5. A great master: Black and gray chemical fertilizer will volatilize, turn gray and black, and be called flowers flying; Gray and black chemical fertilizer will volatilize, turn black and gray, and be called flowers flying
6. Superb and holy: Black and gray chemical fertilizer gray will volatilize, turn gray and black, and be called black and gray flowers will fly; Gray and black chemical fertilizer will volatilize and turn black, gray will be called flowers flying and turn to gray
7. Celestial being: Blacken black and gray chemical fertilizer gray will volatilize, turn gray and black, and be called black and gray flowers will fly back; Gray blacken gray and black chemical fertilizer will volatilize and turn black, gray will be called flowers flying back

The strongest tongue twister in history

I've seen these jokes before, they're still quite classic

I found that the original poster has been posting a lot recently.

There are several really, really wrong ones.
I've collected them.

You just keep asking people to reply, do you want to be a beggar?

Bump

Support the LZ!!!

What Comrade Mao Zedong said is very reasonable...

Haha