Please keep reading to the end, it's just too funny, you'll become 10 years younger!
My mom says my IQ is only 76. I don't know exactly how high my IQ really is either. I only know that I'm a very lethal person. A lot of people have been hurt because of me. Some of them lost hope in life, and some even committed suicide. So I've always suspected that I have hidden superpowers, and for some reason these superpowers work especially strongly on my teachers.
I still remember the first teacher who died because of me. At the time I was in first grade in elementary school, and the teacher took us out into the countryside for a nature practice class. Seeing the spring breeze turning things green and the willows sprouting branches, the teacher couldn't help thinking of a question, so he asked: “Children, do you know how to tell wind direction?” “I do!” a little girl in my class answered as she picked up a leaf from the ground and tossed it into the air. “Pick up something and throw it into the air, then see which way it drifts, and won't you know?” “Mm, very good.” the teacher praised her. “Then is there any other student willing to give everyone another demonstration and see what wind is blowing right now?” “Me.” I volunteered and walked out, picked up half a brick from the ground and threw it into the air... “Reporting to teacher, it's blowing an up-and-down wind right now!”...
I don't remember what the teacher's expression looked like at the time. I only remember that he struggled desperately a few times and then died on the spot. Later, according to the doctors at the hospital, he died because he was suddenly subjected to such a strong shock that his qi and blood flowed backward and he went mad and died. Just like that, I killed a people's teacher.
In first grade the teacher taught us to recognize domestic animals.
Teacher: “There is one kind of animal with two feet. Every morning when Grandpa Sun comes out, it calls you to get up, and keeps calling until you get up. What kind of animal is it?”
I answered: “Mom!” It made the teacher laugh so hard she nearly stopped breathing!
After the midterm exam when I got home, Mom asked me how I did. “Treasure son” said, there was only one question I couldn't fill in. Mom asked what question it was. “Treasure son” said there was one question asking what 3 times 7 equals. At the time, without caring whether it was three-seven or not, I filled in 15. My mom sprayed the water she had just drunk all over my dad's face. Ah.... I'm too great!
My dad asked me how school was. “Treasure son,” Father asked, “is your female teacher satisfied with you?”
“Ah, yes, Dad, very satisfied.”
“How do you know? Did she say so to you herself?”
“Of course, Dad. The day before yesterday she said to me: ‘If all the students were like you, I would leave the school immediately!’ That shows I've already learned everything.” My dad's brain immediately !@#$#@!$%$#@@
One day in math class, the teacher asked 1+1=?. I said I didn't know. The teacher told me to go home and ask. I asked Mom, and Mom was cooking, and told me to get the hell out. I asked Dad, and Dad was watching a ball game, and shouted “Awesome!” I asked my older sister, and she was singing, singing up to BABY. I asked my older brother, and he was on the phone, saying: I'll wait for you outside.
The next day, the teacher asked 1+1=? I said: You get the hell out. The teacher gave me a slap, and I shouted Awesome. The teacher called me an idiot, and I cursed back despicable. Teacher said: Get out. I said: I'll wait for you outside. Our math teacher's high blood pressure acted up again on the spot, and he fainted....
In elementary school when I was in Chinese class, all the Chinese teachers in the school came to listen to Teacher Ni's lesson. Teacher Ni wrote the character “被” on the blackboard and asked me: “Do you recognize this character?” I answered “No,” so Teacher Ni began to guide me like this: “Do you have a bed at home?” I answered “Yes.” “What's on the bed?” “A mat.” “And on the mat?” I answered: “My mom.” Teacher Ni thought, that's not wrong either, on Mom is the quilt, so he continued to guide me: “And on your mom?” “My dad.” Teacher Ni never expected I'd say that. He made a fool of himself in front of so many teachers, and in his panic he asked, “Then where's the quilt?” I answered: “The quilt is on the floor.” Teacher Ni was so angry that “bei me” he also had a seizure and was hospitalized!
If you want to keep reading, please click the link: http://cn.jokes.yahoo.com/030519/150/1m7n0.html
My mom says my IQ is only 76. I don't know exactly how high my IQ really is either. I only know that I'm a very lethal person. A lot of people have been hurt because of me. Some of them lost hope in life, and some even committed suicide. So I've always suspected that I have hidden superpowers, and for some reason these superpowers work especially strongly on my teachers.
I still remember the first teacher who died because of me. At the time I was in first grade in elementary school, and the teacher took us out into the countryside for a nature practice class. Seeing the spring breeze turning things green and the willows sprouting branches, the teacher couldn't help thinking of a question, so he asked: “Children, do you know how to tell wind direction?” “I do!” a little girl in my class answered as she picked up a leaf from the ground and tossed it into the air. “Pick up something and throw it into the air, then see which way it drifts, and won't you know?” “Mm, very good.” the teacher praised her. “Then is there any other student willing to give everyone another demonstration and see what wind is blowing right now?” “Me.” I volunteered and walked out, picked up half a brick from the ground and threw it into the air... “Reporting to teacher, it's blowing an up-and-down wind right now!”...
I don't remember what the teacher's expression looked like at the time. I only remember that he struggled desperately a few times and then died on the spot. Later, according to the doctors at the hospital, he died because he was suddenly subjected to such a strong shock that his qi and blood flowed backward and he went mad and died. Just like that, I killed a people's teacher.
In first grade the teacher taught us to recognize domestic animals.
Teacher: “There is one kind of animal with two feet. Every morning when Grandpa Sun comes out, it calls you to get up, and keeps calling until you get up. What kind of animal is it?”
I answered: “Mom!” It made the teacher laugh so hard she nearly stopped breathing!
After the midterm exam when I got home, Mom asked me how I did. “Treasure son” said, there was only one question I couldn't fill in. Mom asked what question it was. “Treasure son” said there was one question asking what 3 times 7 equals. At the time, without caring whether it was three-seven or not, I filled in 15. My mom sprayed the water she had just drunk all over my dad's face. Ah.... I'm too great!
My dad asked me how school was. “Treasure son,” Father asked, “is your female teacher satisfied with you?”
“Ah, yes, Dad, very satisfied.”
“How do you know? Did she say so to you herself?”
“Of course, Dad. The day before yesterday she said to me: ‘If all the students were like you, I would leave the school immediately!’ That shows I've already learned everything.” My dad's brain immediately !@#$#@!$%$#@@
One day in math class, the teacher asked 1+1=?. I said I didn't know. The teacher told me to go home and ask. I asked Mom, and Mom was cooking, and told me to get the hell out. I asked Dad, and Dad was watching a ball game, and shouted “Awesome!” I asked my older sister, and she was singing, singing up to BABY. I asked my older brother, and he was on the phone, saying: I'll wait for you outside.
The next day, the teacher asked 1+1=? I said: You get the hell out. The teacher gave me a slap, and I shouted Awesome. The teacher called me an idiot, and I cursed back despicable. Teacher said: Get out. I said: I'll wait for you outside. Our math teacher's high blood pressure acted up again on the spot, and he fainted....
In elementary school when I was in Chinese class, all the Chinese teachers in the school came to listen to Teacher Ni's lesson. Teacher Ni wrote the character “被” on the blackboard and asked me: “Do you recognize this character?” I answered “No,” so Teacher Ni began to guide me like this: “Do you have a bed at home?” I answered “Yes.” “What's on the bed?” “A mat.” “And on the mat?” I answered: “My mom.” Teacher Ni thought, that's not wrong either, on Mom is the quilt, so he continued to guide me: “And on your mom?” “My dad.” Teacher Ni never expected I'd say that. He made a fool of himself in front of so many teachers, and in his panic he asked, “Then where's the quilt?” I answered: “The quilt is on the floor.” Teacher Ni was so angry that “bei me” he also had a seizure and was hospitalized!
If you want to keep reading, please click the link: http://cn.jokes.yahoo.com/030519/150/1m7n0.html
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