China DOS Union

This morning, a certain manager of a mobile company suddenly felt the urge to urinate outside and had to find a public toilet.

"Who are you and what are you doing?" the old man shouted.

"I'm the general manager of Mobile, I need to urinate." the manager replied.

"You don't know that everything is charged now, do you?" the old man said.

"Okay, how much is it?" the manager asked.

"50 cents to go in, 30 cents to come out." the old man looked at him.

"What? You have to pay to come out too?" the manager stared.

"Hey, what are you staring at? We implement two-way charging here. If you get a toilet package, you can have one-way charging." the old man stood up as he spoke.

"Okay, I'll pay." he took out ten yuan.

"Do you want to defecate or urinate?" the old man held the money and asked.

"Defecate, hurry up."

"Uh, do you need to get a package? If you defecate fifty times at once, I can give you a discount and let you defecate another thirty times." the old man said.

"Stop talking, I'll go in first and pay right after I come out." The manager went in, chose the last stall and enjoyed it for a long time before coming out.

"Sir, you chose stall number five, so you need to pay the stall selection fee of 50 cents. You didn't say you didn't want to play music while you were in there, so it's 60 cents per time. Also, you stayed in there for fifteen minutes and one second. The first minute is charged at 50 cents per minute, and the rest is charged at 40 cents per minute. Less than a minute is charged as a full minute. Also, because your excrement volume has occupied our sewer bandwidth, please pay an additional monthly fee of 50 yuan. Finally, you can see other people entering the toilet through the small hole, so please pay the visitor display fee of 1 yuan." The manager was already there dumbfounded.

"So, Mr. General Manager, we don't accept card swiping here. In total, you need to pay 59.4 cents. If you are overdue, a late fee of 3‰ per day will be charged, and we won't notify you separately. When it accumulates to 1,000 yuan, we will use legal means to collect it."

Just as the old man finished speaking, Mr. Piggy fell plop into the urinal and fainted.

It seems there is also a version for the general manager on a business trip

This morning, a certain manager of a mobile company suddenly felt the need to use the restroom when he was outside, so he had to look for a public toilet.
"Who are you and what are you doing?" the old man shouted.
"I'm the general manager of Mobile, I need to use the restroom." the manager.
"You don't know that everything needs to be charged now?" the old man.
"Okay, how much is it?" the manager.
"50 cents to go in, 30 cents to come out." the old man looked at him.
"What? You have to charge to come out too?" the manager stared.
"Hey, what are you looking at? We implement two-way charging here. If you handle a toilet package, you can have one-way charging."
The old man stood up as he spoke.
"Okay, I'll pay." he took out ten yuan.
"Do you want to poop or pee?" the old man held the money and asked.
"Poop, hurry up."
"Okay, do you need to handle a package? If you poop 50 times at one go, we can give you a discount and let you poop another 30 times." the old man said.
"Don't talk anymore, I'll go in first and pay right after I come out." The manager went in, chose the last stall, and enjoyed himself for a long time before coming out.
"Sir, you chose stall No. 5, so you need to pay the stall selection fee of 50 cents. You didn't say you didn't want to play music while you were in there, so it's 60 cents per time. Also, you stayed in there for fifteen minutes and one second. The first minute is charged at 50 cents per minute, and the rest are charged at 40 cents per minute. Less than a minute is charged as one minute. Also, since your excrement volume has occupied our sewer bandwidth, please pay an additional monthly fee of 50 yuan. Finally, you can see the others entering the toilet through the small hole, so please pay the person entry display fee of 1 yuan." The manager was already standing there dumbfounded.
"So, Mr. General Manager, we don't accept card swiping. In total, you need to pay 59.4 cents. If you are overdue in payment, a late fee of 3‰ per day will be charged, and we won't notify you separately. When it accumulates to 1,000 yuan, we will use legal means to collect the payment."
The old man had just finished speaking when Mr. Pigule fell plop into the urine and fainted.

Another version is 澡堂

Interesting, really funny.

The leader of a department in China Mobile returned to the place where he had worked as an educated youth to visit old friends. As soon as he got off the car, he checked into a guest house in the town. After a bumpy journey, the leader was sweaty, and he wanted to take a hot bath. The guest house had limited facilities, and there was only a public bathhouse.

The leader arrived at the door of the bathhouse and was stopped by a waiter: "Sir, if you want to take a bath, please pay a one-time installation fee of 15 yuan first. We will install a shower head for you."

The leader was immediately stunned and thought how could this guest house be so extortionate! But out of his status, the leader didn't lose his temper. He paid the money and was about to go in when he was stopped by the waiter again: "Sir, sorry, for the convenience of management, each shower head has a number. Please pay a 10-yuan number selection fee first, and the selected number is only for your exclusive use."

The leader was a bit angry, but he still paid the money and chose the number "8". The waiter then said: "The number you selected is a lucky number. According to regulations, you also have to pay an 8-yuan special number surcharge." What the hell! The leader suppressed his anger and said, "Then I change to number 4. Number 4 is not a lucky number either, there's no need to pay any special number surcharge, right?"

The waiter said: "Number 4 is an ordinary number, so of course no special surcharge is needed, but you have to pay a 5-yuan number change fee."

The leader shook his head helplessly and thought how simple the local people's conduct was back then. Unexpectedly, now they were making up all kinds of excuses to make money. Really, the moral decline! After the leader paid the money, he asked more boldly: "Now I can go in and take a bath, right?"

The waiter smiled and said: "Of course, of course you can, please go in." The leader gave him a glare and walked in with big steps. The waiter suddenly added: "Sorry, I also have to tell you: since number 4 shower head is only for your exclusive use, no matter whether you come to take a bath or not, you have to pay a monthly rent of 7.5 yuan. In addition, each time you take a bath, you have to pay 6 yuan for every 30 minutes. Also, the time to pay the fee each month is before the 20th. If you are overdue, you have to pay a certain late fee..."

"Enough, enough, I don't want to take a bath anymore!" The leader was furious and turned to leave. The waiter then asked: "Are you really not going to take a bath?"

The leader said in a stern voice: "Yes! I will never take a bath here again!"

The waiter smiled and said: "If you don't use number 4 shower head anymore, then you also have to pay a 9.8-yuan cancellation fee. Only in this way can you never have to pay any fees to us in the future."

The leader was furious and had a big argument with the waiter. After a while, the manager of the guest house came hearing the news. When the leader saw the manager coming, he shouted loudly to lodge a complaint. After the manager learned about the situation, he smiled and said to the leader: "Sir, sorry, maybe you don't know yet, the bath industry here is a monopoly business. Fortunately, you didn't soak in the pool, otherwise we would also charge you a [roaming] fee."

The above post is full of implicit meanings