『楼 主』:
[转贴]爱情的黑色幽默你知几分
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台湾作家张晓风说过这样一句话：“生命是一次随时可以中止的契约，爱情在最醇美的时候，可以跨越生死。”80后的年轻男女们，在这个速食爱情时代，关于爱情，灵子为大家总结了24条爱情的黑色幽默。
1、不要把爱情当游戏，拥有时就认真对待！
2、拒绝使用快餐爱情，感情不是用过就甩！
3、就算已经达到嘴对嘴的关系，也要保持手牵手的距离！
4、情书大全在图书的分类，应该属于科幻类！
5、不要以为男人喜欢瘦女人，他们要的是整体苗条，局部丰满！
6、男人的习惯是，说“我要你”时生猛有劲；讲“我爱你”时有气无力！
7、多少要学会一些糟蹋男人的方法，否则这么多的无聊男子该如何打发！
8、结婚前要做健康检查，恋爱时要做智力测验！
9、失恋的明显症状就是失态！
10、爱情老手，通常不会轻易将恋爱谈出结果！
11、从眼睛流露出来的爱情比较不容易造假！
12、要善待爱情，因为它不会一辈子跟着你！
13、男人心虚的反应常有两种，献殷勤和耍无赖！
14、婚姻是难度最高的爱情，因为必须边啃面包边谈它！
15、所谓外遇，就是有了爱情和面包之后，还想吃蛋糕的心情！
16、世界上没有不会做家事的男人，只有不愿做家事的丈夫！
17、做个智慧的女人，要懂得如何去爱一个男人和他的钱！
18、所谓罗曼蒂克就是帮老婆买回包心菜时会顺手带回朵玫瑰花！
19、不用怀疑，顺着红地毯的方向就能轻易地走到厨房！
20、好男人不是怕老婆，而是尊重老婆！
21、谨记不要因为爱眼中的他，失去他眼中的你!
22、谈好恋爱的秘诀在于，不必严肃，但必须正经！
23、选择好男人需要方法，在尚未抓到诀窍前只要学会说“不”！
24、男人女人，在一起互相珍重，分手时华丽转身！
曾听人说过“喜欢是淡淡的爱，爱是深深的喜欢”。爱情于年轻男女来说，珍惜和付出会让爱情甜蜜发酵。所以，恋爱中的你们，要认真对待你们的拥有，不要等到失去时才感叹曾经没有好好珍惜。
Taiwanese writer Zhang Xiaofeng once said: "Life is a contract that can be terminated at any time, and love can transcend life and death when it is at its most mellow." Among the post-80s young men and women, in this era of fast-food love, Lingzi has summarized 24 black humors about love for everyone.
1. Don't treat love as a game; when you have it, take it seriously!
2. Refuse to use fast-food love; feelings shouldn't be discarded after use!
3. Even if you've reached the point of mouth-to-mouth contact, you should still maintain a hand-in-hand distance!
4. The category of love letter collections in books should belong to the science fiction category!
5. Don't think that men like thin women; what they want is overall slenderness and partial plumpness!
6. Men's habit is to be vigorous when saying "I want you" and listless when saying "I love you"!
7. You should learn some ways to tease men to some extent; otherwise, how would you pass the time with so many boring men!
8. You should have a health check before marriage and an intelligence test during dating!
9. The obvious symptom of a broken heart is losing one's composure!
10. Love veterans usually don't easily bring a relationship to a conclusion!
11. Love revealed from the eyes is less likely to be fake!
12. You should be kind to love because it won't follow you forever!
13. There are usually two reactions when a man is guilty: being obsequious and being unreasonable!
14. Marriage is the most difficult form of love because you have to talk about it while eating bread!
15. The so-called extramarital affair is the mood to want a cake after having love and bread!
16. There are no men who can't do housework; there are only husbands who don't want to do housework!
17. Be a smart woman; know how to love a man and his money!
18. The so-called romantic is buying a cabbage for your wife and bringing back a rose by the way!
19. Don't doubt; you can easily walk from the red carpet direction to the kitchen!
20. A good man isn't afraid of his wife; he respects his wife!
21. Always remember not to lose yourself in his eyes because you love him!
22. The secret to a good relationship is not to be serious but to be earnest!
23. There are methods to choose a good man; before mastering the trick, just learn to say "no"!
24. Men and women should cherish each other when together and turn gracefully when breaking up!
I once heard someone say "Liking is a faint love, and love is a deep liking". For young men and women, cherishing and giving will make love ferment sweetly. So, you in love, take your possession seriously; don't wait until it's lost to lament that you didn't cherish it before.
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